SEATTLE – A week ago, a friend told me about a little corner coffee shop in North Hollywood called Enlightened Cup-a-Joe Gaming Commune. He visited it on a Saturday morning while he and his girlfriend were on vacation, and now he swears he has found the meaning to life.
“They call themselves the breakfast cult and their mission is to spread the word of casual gaming over coffee,” he began explaining to me in a small coffee shop in Seattle. “Typically, a lot of the members go do yoga or complete some form of workout every Saturday and then they commune at the coffee shop and drink a myriad of roasts while they play casual games together like Jackpot Magic Slots or Gummy Drop.”
“So, it’s like a workout group that has coffee instead of brunch?” I asked.
“No, it’s not like brunch. It’s purity of body, mind, and soul. We workout first to purify our bodies. We drink coffee after to stimulate our minds and we play casual games to calm our souls.”
I immediately noticed he said “we” in every sentence. “You said we.”
“Yeah, John. Well, I’m a believer. That’s why I asked you here today. I want you to join me. I’m going to start my own Enlightened Cup-a-Joe Gaming Commune right here in Seattle. I’m going to buy this very coffee shop.”
I stared at him for a second and then looked around the old house that someone had turned into a coffee shop. I felt confused. “With what money?”
“I have some investors and I was hoping you’d help.”
I laughed. “Are you asking me to make a donation or something?
“Don’t laugh. As Bill Paxton once said in Edge of Tomorrow, gaming is the great redeemer. It is how true heroes are forged. The one place where all share the same rank, regardless of where they are at in life. I want you to join me. To be my partner in building this purity group here in Seattle. We’re going to call it, Nirvana Coffee Gaming House.”
For some reason, I immediately thought of his girlfriend. Maybe it was because I never saw her play video games or even use a smartphone. She prefers those vintage flip phones from the 2000s. “Uh, okay. What does Kelly think about this?”
He took a moment to respond. “Well, the thing is…we broke up a week ago. She isn’t a believer and doesn’t like that I’ve spent the last three Saturdays in this coffee shop playing games.”
I didn’t know how to respond. “I’m sorry.”
“No, it’s alright. Really. I’m a changed man. I feel great.”
“Okay?” I respond simply – still wondering if my friend was playing a joke on me.
“Before you answer, will you just try it? Go order a coffee and then sit down and start playing a game with us.”
My eyes narrowed. “Us?”
My friend motioned to everyone in the coffee shop. “Yeah, us. This is our congregation.”
I looked around at everyone. They were all drinking coffee and playing games on their phones. Some glanced up from their screens and waved at me. I don’t know why I did what I did next. Maybe I felt bad for him or maybe this change in my friend made me curious.
Whatever it was, I decided to walk up to the barista and ask for a triple mochaccino. After getting my sugary dessert, I sat down next to my friend, loaded up Jackpot Magic Slots on my phone, and joined the Breakfast Cult Club my friend had made within the game. We played slots, competed against other slot players, and drank coffee for two hours that day, and honestly, I enjoyed it. Go figure. I don’t know. Maybe he is onto something. Maybe I’ll join him again next Saturday. Stay tuned.
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Note: This story was created solely for gaming laughing matters. Hope you enjoyed it.