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New York – It was a competition for food enthusiasts everywhere. The first of its kind. A showdown between champion eater, Mitch “The Endless Pit” McCaw, and the world’s fastest chef, Kelly “Fast Dishes” Reigns. If you think other cooking shows are kind of a big dill, this one was a real game changer – a reality competition show that played hot potato with viewer’s emotions.  The competition was called The High Noon Cookdown and it was a hungry good ol’ time. The show brought huge numbers of couch potatoes to Foodie Premium Network, racking up nearly one billion views worldwide.


The show centered on one huge challenge: could the top competitive eater keep up with Reigns’ gourmet dishes or would another one bite the crust?

The rules were simple: if McCaw cleared his plate before Reigns could serve up another dish, McCaw would win. If McCaw didn’t finish by the time the next cloche lifted, the prize would go to Reigns. Any dish was fair game – big, small, hot, or cold – as long as it passed the referee’s taste test and was delivered before “The Endless Pit” finished his last meal.

For those who are unfamiliar with McCaw, he was a member of the Association of Independent Competitive Eaters until recently when he ate more than his fair share and was pushed out by the group. He is the bad boy of competitive eating, has the biggest appetite, and he lets everyone know that he loves it when you call him Big Papaya.

Reigns, on the other hand, is more like a speedy superhero with a humble personality. At the age of 18, she opened her first restaurant in New York City. It now has four Michelin Stars; the only restaurant in the world to earn that grate honor. Since her first restaurant launched, she has expanded her food empire to Rome, Paris, and Rio, and partnered with Big Fish Games to release a time management cooking game called Cooking Craze. Now, the sky’s the limit. As Reigns herself likes to say, she has all the thyme in the world ahead of her.


McCaw made for a great antagonist to Reigns’ clear meta-human abilities. Together the two delivered a show that offered an out-of-this-world test of the human stomach. Fires were started. Mises were en placed. Food was spilled and thrown. Belches were delivered. But in the end, there could be only one winner. Or so we thought.

The competition ended in an unexpected draw. The timer went off just as McCaw cleaned his last plate and as the referee finished taste testing Reigns’ newest dish. Due to the timing of it all and the referee’s extra gulps of food, it was decided the only fair result was to call it a draw. There is currently no expected rematch between the two foodie powerhouses but the network did announce they fired their referee host for his eating interference in the show.

When asked why he interfered with the competition, the referee simply responded, “I don’t wanna taco about it.”

Note: While this is a fictional story that was created for chuckles, donut worry! The Cooking Craze game does exist and will be coming soon to a worldwide audience. Look for it in the App Store, Play Store, and Amazon Appstore next week.

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